One of my friends, Sneha,
called me up today and related to me how she and her boyfriend had a narrow
escape while passing by the Birla Mandir area in Kolkata yesterday evening. There
were a couple of guys, she said, who passed some comments on Sneha’s body
hugging sweater and even tried to grope her up in front of her boyfriend. They had
to run to prevent further molestation. The problem of eve-teasing is growing
day by day in Kolkata, Sneha said, and I couldn’t agree more. A glimpse at any
regular newspaper, and cases of eve-teasing and physical harassment of women are
sure to appear at some corner or the other. It’s a little strange I feel, since
people nowadays have greater access to all kinds of pornography which accounts
for the release of much of their pent up sexual energy. Logically, this should lead to a
decrease in the rate of sexual abuse of women by men in the streets. But reality
tells us otherwise. In this age of open sexuality and independence, women still
encounter unwanted trespassing on their bodies. But why?
This question reminded me of
one such incident that I myself had faced about a year ago near the Jadavpur
Police Station area, Kolkata. It was about five in the evening but already
quite dark as winter was about to step into the city. Most of my friends had
already left the University, but I was late since I had some library work to do
for an upcoming exam. After collecting the necessary study material, I packed
my bag and started walking towards the bus-stop which was just five minutes
away. And then it happened. A group of young men, sitting on parts of a broken
wall started approaching me. I was taken aback. They weren’t familiar faces and
their motive seemed sinister. They exchanged dirty smiles among each other and
stared at my bosom like wild dogs lusting for meat. I wore a normal kurti and
jeans. So the crap that women ‘provoke’ men to launch into animalistic behavior was
out of the question. I bent my head pretending to ignore them and walked a pace
or two again. They followed. I began to feel helpless now. It was quite dark and
very few people were around. Moreover, we were so well guarded by random trees
that it was very difficult for me to draw attention to any passing vehicle from
there. So there was no point shouting for help, I realized. The men had
realized that too, I guess, because they gradually started cornering me. They were
no longer quiet. Frequent references to my breasts and hips were being made in
the crudest possible language.
“Maal tar mai dekhechhis? Puro
dairy farm, mairi!”
(“Just look at her boobies! A whole
dairy farm, eh?”)
Suddenly, anger struck me. A surge
of rage engulfed my fear, my anxiety. For a moment, I became oblivious of the
danger of it all and shouted back,
“Haramkhor shuorer bachha! Baray
ato gorom to baap ke katiye nijer ma ke chod na giye!”
(“Bloody bastards, sons of a
bitch! If your dick is so big, why don’t you dodge your father and then fuck
your own mother instead?”)
I had barely realized what I had
just said when the men started staring at me again, no not at my ‘assets’ this
time, but at my face. I didn’t know what they thought or felt. They just kept standing
dumbstruck, as if each of them had been actually rooted to that particular
spot. I didn’t wait any more and walked straight away from the place with long
steps.
When I had reached the
bus-stop, I was still fuming. My throat felt dry and soar with all that
unexpected shouting coming forth from within without a warning. But a sense of
satisfaction slowly calmed me down. I did it!! My tongue did the trick. It was
not merely an escape, but also a victory! It was the best feeling in this whole
world. It was as if I had answered back the trespassers on behalf of the entire
womankind. I felt proud of myself for being able to protect my own body without
any external help. In fact, that experience taught me that it doesn’t take a
phenomenal woman to raise a voice of protest, any Mina, Sneha or Rachita can do
it. Those filthy eve teasers are so used to associating women with fear,
helplessness and fleeing that it never occurs to them that we are as much alive
as they are and can bite back if needed. I believe it’s high time that we make
such sick men realize that any form of sexual abuse, be it raping or eve
teasing, would no longer be shushed. We can, and we will pay them back in their
own coins. No social role-playing can hold us back. It is sad but true that there
are still some people, many of them women themselves, who claim that the
responsibility for sexual violation ultimately rests with the woman herself. She
must have provoked the men with her titillating mannerisms and revealing outfits. This
double standard must be stopped. What nonsense is this? Do we women jump at men
who walk around in shorts? Do we try to gang-rape men who swim in a one piece
swim-suit?
When I told Sneha about that
incident today, she was shocked as well. “Oh god! How could you use such
language! It’s incredible!” she said. I didn’t answer her but in my heart I knew
that if ever I be dragged to the moral court for using indecent language, I would
plead “PROVOKED”.
